Have you ever heard of “My Pet Rock”? This was a bestseller that sold for almost $4, and that wasn’t chump change back in 1975. The creator of this concept was Gary Dahl, who got imported rocks from Mexico (seriously, they weren’t just rocks lying around in the good ol’ USA), who then packed each rock in a cardboard box that looked like a pet carrier. It even had a bed of straw plus air holes. Then it also came with a pet training manual (all 32 pages of it) with tips and tricks on how to train your pet.
Yes, it sounds stupid now. But Gary Dahl sold more than 5 million of these rocks, and cleared up to $15 million dollars. And that soon opened the floodgates, as many imitators flooded the consumer market soon afterwards.
Of course, you don’t have to look all that far in history to find other bestsellers that don’t make sense. In the 21st century, you have stupid stuff like the Atkins Diet, the Snuggies, the TV show Jersey Shore, and the iPhone 4. All these things really became popular, although we scratch our heads today and wonder how these things happened.
That brings us to my visit to Bob Evans, which my buddy told me was a great place to eat. So, I came with him, and order what were supposed to be the bestsellers here. And to tell you the truth, I was underwhelmed. Here’s a list of what I got:
Banana Nut Bread
This was intriguing, to say the least. I found this in the Bakery and Desserts section, but it didn’t make sense. As a dessert, it couldn’t exactly match up against the pies and biscuits. And it’s not filling enough for breakfast.
It wasn’t even anything special. Sure, the nuts did give it a boost of flavor and a different texture to break the monotony of the banana flavor. But it sure was boring. How the heck did this become a bestseller. It’s just another banana bread, and it’s no different from the other banana breads you can buy (or make yourself).
Sausage Gravy and Biscuits
I took a glance at a photo in the Bob Evans website of this thing, and it sure didn’t look all that appetizing. In real life, it looked the same. The words I was thinking of to describe this monstrosity were all scatological.
Perhaps it’s a cultural thing. I’m not from the Midwest or from the South, so I wasn’t all that familiar with sausage gravy. This is a regional favorite, I’m told. Sausage gravy is a kind of white gravy filled with sausage chunks, and usually poured over a biscuit. Bob Evans restaurants serve this, since their locations are all in the South and Midwest.
As I’m really partial to biscuits turning soggy while drowning in thick, gluey gravy, I wasn’t really enthusiastic about this. I’m sure it tastes great, but I just couldn’t get over the looks of it.
My buddy did admit that for sausage gravy, the one at Bob Evans is just okay and not great. I just took his word for it.
Western Omelet
Bob Evans has quite a few omelets in its menu, and I was hungry enough to contemplate going for the $11 Southwest Avocado Omelet. But then my friend (at this point I was already questioning this friendship) reminded me that I was taste-testing the menu using the bestsellers. And that means going with the Western Omelet.
It didn’t really look all that good in its online photo, but I went with it. The description seemed good enough, as it promised hickory-smoked ham, sauteed onions, red and green bell peppers, and cheddar cheese. My pick of sides included hash browns, home fries, and fresh-cut fruit, along with fresh biscuits.
But the hickory-smoked ham and the cheddar cheese didn’t really bring a lot of flavor to the omelet, and it didn’t help that the texture was rather spongy. All I tasted was the bell peppers, which I know overused as a cheap filler for many dishes. Basically, this was just another boring option.
Sweet & Creamy Cappuccino
The plain coffee here isn’t their top-selling drink. It’s not a soda, either. It’s this Sweet & Creamy Cappuccino. It’s really creamy, as it has a generous amount of whipped cream on top.
I’m no coffee snob, so it didn’t matter that there wasn’t some foamy milk instead. The problem was that this drink was just too sugary. And that overly sugary taste just doesn’t match up well with any type of food. Take this with some pancake, and you’re also getting a sugar overload.
Final Words
I’m sure that Bob Evans fans will have their own opinions on the matter, and that’s what the comments section is for. Hopefully, you guys will recommend alternatives to these so-called bestsellers. Make sure they’re interesting dishes, okay?
